Why I am taking a break AGAIN

In my previous post, I mentioned about taking the fast lane and keep up that swift pacing because simply, that’s the purpose of the lane. But would it be wise to prioritize what others think about you being on the pedestal?

This might sound hilarious to those persons whom I entrusted what I truly felt but who are quick to judge my plan of taking a break again from law school. Am I in a hurry because it is what I want, or am I just in a hurry because the people who came before me, need my strong credentials. Since I have big shoes to fill in, I need to double time and do everything I can to meet up their demands in the next election. I need to do this and that, finish this and that, without even taking a pause to ask God if this is what He wants in my life.

Oftentimes, we become quick in deciding on important matters because we think that we got it all under control. We forget to ask God: “Is this what you want Lord?” or “Are these things in line with my value as a Christian?”

When we fall into the repercussions of our faulty decisions, because we did not really pray about it first, we blame ‘God, why are you letting this happen to me?’ or sometimes we blame others for the turnout of our decisions. The truth is, your financial distress, your toxic romantic relationship, your diet-related illness, your mismatched career, or your poor academic performance is the result of you not putting God at the center of your life.

Today, I woke up and realized I still want to become a lawyer, but maybe I need to realign my values first and realign my priorities in life first. Acknowledging that I have put so much time and effort into building a relationship that is not really ready for commitment is like creating an idol in my life. It has somehow blinded me from seeing that I still have a life separate and distinct from my significant other. Though, I am not ashamed of my haphazard decisions about that, I am happy that I experienced pain and discomfort at a certain level because I am constantly learning from it.

For now, I just would like to savor this moment. Repent of my sins and disobedience. Take a break and review. Most especially, drive to the places where we could have gone (together).

What decisions have you been struggling of this week?


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