On life’s purpose: Why am I anxious in my mid-20’s?

Dear Ladies,

I am back after a short rest from blogging and I know that a lot has happened to you as well from all the holidays and the kick-off to this new year. You know, it is already February and before we know it, we might be surprised that we are preparing for Christmas again this year.

We live in today’s super fast world. Where every information is just a Google away, all the news about our friends abroad are readily available in our news feed, probably all that we need is just one-buy-click away, and our days seem so short lately.

Almost three out of five ladies that I have talked with over the past week have told me that life has been this cycle of waking up, eating, working, paying bills, and sleeping, and what not. It is almost impossible to live a life without a job yet live so comfortably. Everything has its price – and comfort seems to cost a hell lot than what we make out of our office jobs!

Why do we keep running anyway?

Perhaps, I am not just the busiest public servant in this country, but I am trying hard to keep a balanced life when it comes to contributing to community, keeping a harmonious relationship with family and friends, hacking financial freedom, pursuing my passion project, and of course, preparing to meet my future spouse. It is a dilemma lately, and sometimes it feels absurd to be all anxious about all of the things that the future holds. Especially that I am turning 26 this year. I feel a little old for some things in life. Probably, most of the young adults in their mid-20’s could relate to my sentiments. I want you to know that you are not alone.

The good news though is, it is not really too late for us to live a more intentional life even at 26!

 

Norms. Stop keeping up with the pace of what the society thinks you should do in every situation. The more you allow yourself to go with the flow, and against your will, the more you will lose yourself along the way. We are called “weirdos” when we try not to blend in with the trend, but the people whose self-worth is based on what others think are lost.

When you decided to let go of a long-term girlfriend for 8 years and decided to pursue another woman who reciprocates your love, people will really say something about you – that you are one hell of a liar or unfaithful. Screw it. The decision you make is all up to you. The repercussions are on you, not on them. People say you should stick and end up with the person whom you had been together with for long years, but do the long years matter when you know that it’s all falling apart?

Money. This is important, but it doesn’t have to define how you should live your life or your happiness. Sure, there is happiness in being able to travel the world with lots of money (it’s damn true), but if the painter gives you a little paintbrush for your artwork while the other student got a bigger paintbrush, does it necessarily mean that you are disadvantaged?

You have loans to be paid, but you want to explore and travel the world. Live the life that those famous bloggers have, get paid by eating at high-end restaurants or sleeping at their hotels, get more followers and be famous! Well, I have nothing against bloggers, but the point here is, whatever situation you are in at right now, accept it. And make the most out of it. Earn a decent money by getting a decent job. Save for your emergency fund. Gradually earn something extra for your passion project and start it while you have the energy to do so.

Past. The first week of January 2018, I wandered in Guimaras for some quiet-time, me-time. I found myself being adopted by a couple who are both journalists and artists for few days. I didn’t really know them, but they welcomed me and fed me with the most delicious vegetarian food in their home (not bad for a pescatarian like me). They knew though that I am an elected official and had been walking a path where people expect me to excel.

Days slowed down and the chirping of the birds woke me up in the morning. The quiet treks I took up the peak of the hill to witness sunsets were more than enough to battle with all the thoughts I had. The anonymity that I carry with me in that place was a relief. No one knows me, except the beautiful couple.

I thought I could leave all my hurtful pasts in that place. Leave it all there, all the regrets, mistakes, and stupid decisions so I could go on with my life luggage-free. I was wrong. My past is part of me. I can’t possibly forget all the pain at once, the people who judged me, and the exes who made me feel that I am a mistake and I am not enough. But I can forgive them and forgive myself for not being perfect at anything.

 

Well, now, I am single. Yeah, it is a little daunting sometimes being single at 25, but I had been too anxious about the thought of living alone for some time already. I can’t keep being in a relationship that I am not really ready for. It is a matter of choice.

Yes, we are in our mid-20’s  now and it is a great opportunity for us to find where our heart is on fire and contribute to the community.

2 thoughts on “On life’s purpose: Why am I anxious in my mid-20’s?

  1. I feel like I’m on a constant cycle, too. With my type of job, I have to always be in the know – there’s no mental break. Even when I do make plans to go out, I’m already thinking when am I going to home? It’s terrible.

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    • Hi Kate! Thank you for reading my post. You know, you are not alone. A lot of us are feelig that life is a cycle, but whatever situation or job you have now, there will always be a way for you to live a more intentional life – choose to be thankful. God bless you! 😊

      Like

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